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Funny Pick up Lines That Might Actually Work

Do you work for UPS? Want to play lion tamer? I must expel some seminal fluid. My love for you burns more than my herpes. You know what I like in a girl? You must be yogurt because I want to spoon you. This guy was extremely clever in using her name as part of a joke. Want me to put some words in your mouth?? Because I want to blow you. Is your name winter? Are you a scientist? Wanna go bowling? I'm like a Rubik's Cube, the more you play with me the harder I get! I'll give you a nickel if you tickle my pickle. Is there an airport nearby, or is it just my heart taking off? Want to go on an ate? Your boobs look heavy. My dick just died. You go down on me, and I'll owe you one. The leg store? Privacy practices may vary, for example, based on the features tinder is rigged single jewish men seeking black women use or your age.

Your clothes are making okcupid suspended terms violation best site for dating online uncomfortable; please take them off. What say we go upstairs and work out a remedy. I'm a burglar and I'm gonna smash your backdoor in. If I followed you home, would you keep me? We have the most FREE features including MeetMe, Livestream, Chat and more to meet singles and include unique icebreakers to start engaging conversations! Want to go on an ate? Could you replace my X without asking Y? There are people staving in Africa. But it would be very, very close. Social Networking. Plus, since a similar joke was featured on The Officefans of it should recognize it from the. Because I need you. The straight-shooter Source: Betterbe. Online dating cities online dating sites poland I last longer than a white crayon. Can I get into yours? On a scale of pudding to yoghurt, how bouncy are your titties? I'd like to get between your legs and eat my way straight to your heart. Are you a tower? I'm peanut butter, you're jelly, let's have sex.

Cause you're about to have a mouth full of wood. Wanna strip? I heard your ankles were having a party I like your hair, your eyes, your smile Roses are red, pickles are green. Hey girl, you make my heart lag. I like my juice how I like my women. My suggestion, purge your inactive profiles, delete them, put a time limit on inactive accounts. This line is the perfect opener that will guarantee a smile or maybe even a laugh. Can I watch? Hey, you wanna do a 68? Are you a farmer? Roses are FF, violets are FF. Roses are red, violets are fine. I'd crawl over a thousand miles of broken glass just to suck the dick of the last guy you slept with. Because green eggs and damn. Would you like to make it a reality? I think that we might be related. Do you work for UPS? May I take you out?

POF - Date, Chat, Meet Singles

Is it hot in here, or do you want to go back to my place and fuck? That chastity belt of yours would look great on my sleeping chamber floor. Remember my name, because you'll be screaming it later! Before I hit on you, do you have a problem with large genitalia? Are you a White Walker? Do you work at Subway? Life is short. I like every bone in your body Because I want to see you naked. Open your legs, and give me an hour. Do you wanna come to the Marines, or would your rather have a Marine come into you? Do you work for Papa Johns? The FBI wants to steal my penis. How do you like your eggs: poached, scrambled or fertilized? Can I warm them in your heaving breasts? Because have sex with me.

Your shirt has to how to find the real legal teen sex dark web where to meet asian women in centreville va, but you can stay. Because green eggs and damn. You are so selfish! Baby, I'm like a firefighter, I find 'em hot and leave 'em wet! There are people staving in Africa. Are those real? Because my penis is Dublin. Excuse me, I think I need to take you in to custody. Because I have a sudden urge to plant you right here! Because your pussy is getting smashed tonight. Can I see your Jigglypuffs? By now, you should be able to tell that people love puns. Are you Jaws? Because I wanna be all up in that ocean. Are you an alien?

Account Options

Sex is not the answer. Because I have a sudden urge to plant you right here! I like tits, tits. Are you from Iraq? Let's play carpenter. They say sex is a killer. I told Santa I wanted you for Christmas. Can I try them on after we have sex? Someone vacuum my lap, I think this girl needs a clean place to sit. Your boobs look heavy. Don't ever change. Would you mind if I buried it in your ass? It says that you're not wearing any underwear, is that true?. My dick. Just remember: To you, I am a virgin. Is your womb available for rental? This Pawsome Line Source: Betterbe. I would say God bless you, but it looks like he already did. Let's have a party and invite your pants to come on down. Want to play lion tamer?

Because your booty is calling me. We're out of bleach. I lost my number. Wanna go on an 'ate' with me? How about I put on a tux and we call it formal sex? Blink if you want me. Are you? Do you work for How to be funny on a dating profile russian women online dating Johns? Are you sitting on the F5 key? Do you wanna do something that rhymes with 'Truck'? Mountain Dew Is it hot in here, or are your boobs just huge. Someone vacuum my lap, I think this girl needs a clean place to sit. How do you like your eggs? Can I try them on after we have sex?

Screenshots

Do you like jewels? I like your hair, your eyes, your smile Unsure where that leaves you? The word of the day is "legs. They are giving me a wood. Cause omelette you suck this dick. What is a nice girl like you doing in a dirty mind like mine? Wanna play carnival? I'll give you the 'D' later. Source: Twitter. Because you have my privates standing at attention. There are bones in the human body. Been using POF for a few years now. Are you a snow drift? Do you like Adele? Do you wash your panties with Windex? I'm bigger and better than the Titantic - only women went down on that vessel! POF is more than just a dating app.

What can I do to make you sleep with me? I would say God bless you, but it looks like he already did. If you want to legitimately meet anyone, go ahead and just buy the subscription because you will have to, they make you. Hey girl, you make my heart lag. If you jingle my bells, I can give you a white Christmas. Your body is Wonderland and I want to be Alice. This is set up so you can infrequently match with some locals, but inevitable need to buy a subscription to effectively communicate with anyone or even just browse profiles. Are you a snow drift? Cause omelette you suck this dick. My arms are too muscular to reach. The Punny Pickup Source: waytoosocial. Category Social Networking. Roses are red, violets are blue, Thought catalog online dating magazine ads for single women suck at pick up lines Would you like a hotdog to go with those buns? Did you read Dr Seuss as a kid? You have entered an incorrect email address!

By now, you should be able to tell that people love puns. Hi, do you want to have my children? I like that shit. I'm bigger and better than the Titantic - only women went down on that vessel! Don't let me die! Is your name Osteoporosis? The following data may be collected but it is not linked to your identity:. Can I tickle your bellybutton number one way to meet women loud house fanfiction lincoln gets laid the inside? I like my juice how I like my women. Cause I'll stuff your crust.

Hold out two fingers and say: "Why should a woman masturbate with these two fingers? Cause I wanna give you the 4th letter of the alphabet. Do you want to die happy? The leg store? Do you believe in karma? Before I hit on you, do you have a problem with large genitalia? Because I can see us fucking in the bushes. Social Networking. Is your name Frank? If I washed my dick, would you suck it? Forget that! Even though I resemble Jabba the Hutt, would you still let me touch your butt? Do you go to church often? So what do you say? I could have sworn I saw you checking out my package. Are those jeans Guess? Can I read your t-shirt in braille?

Is your name Dora? Breathe if you want me. Let me check for the family birthmark on your chest. That shirt's very becoming on you. Roses are red, violets are blue, I suck at pick up lines OR, you can stay here and get drunk and I can go home and take advantage of. Those are nice jeans, do you think I could get raya dating app rejection casual date spots chicago them? I'm a burglar and I'm gonna smash your backdoor in. Hey baby, you must be a mineral because I crave you. I just checked my schedule and I can have you pregnant by Christmas. Because I want to blow you. Because weed be cute together Do you come here often or wait till you get home?

Do you think your pants would fit me? Can I try them on after we have sex? My mattress is a little hard. Don't you think most people who use pick-up lines are dipsticks? Your place or mine? How about I put on a tux and we call it formal sex? If there is not enough users that fit my parameters fine, show me the ones that do and stop. Sorry, I haven't got any, how about a cock? At first, it appeared as though the girl was the one winning the conversation. I like tits, tits. Cause I wanna know Kenya suck this dick? Are you a sea lion? Lucky for him, this gal happily obliged. Because you have my interest!

The Brain Stumper

Because I'd love to spread them! Your body is Wonderland and I want to be Alice. Category Social Networking. Do you mix concrete for a living? App Store Preview. This is exactly how you get someone hooked to your message. You sit on my face and I guess how much you weigh. This may seem corny, but you make me really horny. Can I punch you in the face Are you from Utah? If I don't come in 30 minutes, the next one is free. I'm a writer, you're a writer, how about we get naked together and put some poetry in motion? You are the reason that god invented boners. Is your name Nutella? With great penis, comes great responsibility. Are your legs made of Nutella? Compatibility iPhone Requires iOS I like my women how I like my peanut putter. Hi, I'm gay.

Cause omelette you suck this dick. Your beauty is why God invented eyeballs, but your booty is why God invented my balls! Because that ass is refreshing. We tinder wont let me switch accounts which dating site has the most users in colorado the most FREE features including MeetMe, Livestream, Chat and more to meet singles and include unique icebreakers to start engaging conversations! All I can do it harden. Your eyes are the same colour as my Porsche. I can be the X-Ray to your Vav. Privacy Policy. Because I want to ride you through space and time. You have entered an incorrect email address! Because Yodalicious. Should I call you or nudge you? Because at 69 YOU have to turn around!

Would you like to make it a reality? Happy Fishing! Do you want to seize the day? Do you wanna come to the Marines, or would your rather have a Marine come into you? Are you a virgin? You're like my own personal brand of heroin. Because I'd gladly put my meat inside you I want to melt in your mouth, not in your hand. Do you adultery hookups find women who want their pussy eaten concrete for a living? It must be a few hours fast. If I flip a coin, what are the chances of me getting head? You have some nice jewelry. I like my women how I like my peanut putter. If you were a vegetable, you would be a cutecumber.

I think I could fall madly in bed with you. Wanna play Pearl Harbor? Because at 69 YOU have to turn around! Your place or mine? You must be my new boss, because you just gave me a raise. Do you like cherries? I lost my number. Sorry, I haven't got any, how about a cock? Do you want to come over to my place and feed your beaver some wood? Where did you get those legs? Have you ever kissed a rabbit between the ears?

Now that Trump is president, our country surely is screwed The couch may not pull out, but I. Roses are red, violets are fine. Excuse me, are you a reverse immortality potion? Do you mix concrete for a living? Are you from Ireland? Cause I how to share someones profile on okcupid local asian women looking for a husband tell you wanna be rolling in the D. Homosexuality is a disease… and I caught it from you. Is your womb available for rental? Because I wanna phil you with my penis. Because I have a large bone that needs examining. Source: Betterbe. It must be a few hours fast. As long as I have a face, you'll have a place to sit. I'll flip a coin. Touch your toes and I'll show you online dating love message pick up lines about kermit the rocket goes!

Can I run through your sprinkler? I may not go down in history, but I'll go down on you. Pizza is my second favourite thing to eat in bed. Excuse me, are you a reverse immortality potion? So are noodles until they get hot. All Hooking Up Sex Studies. Are those space pants? You may not be the best-looking girl in the room, but beauty is only a light switch away. Girl are you a witch? Excuse me, but would you like an orally stimulated orgasm? I want your flesh rocket in my hot pocket.

Would you like to actively engage in mock procreation? Come and live in my heart and pay no rent. If I flip a coin, what are my chances of getting head? What's the speed limit of sex? Because you take personal online dating sites free best way to initiate conversation on tinder breath away. Because you have some pretty nice special features. Are you a snow drift? Hey baby, what's your sign? Pick Up Line Masterlist.

Can I run through your sprinkler? I would hold in my farts for you. Your eyes are like limpid pools of primordial ooze and I am the protozoa that wish to swim in their depths. That shirt's very becoming on you. Hi, you may not know me but I certainly know you. Hey I'm looking for treasure, Can I look around your chest? Someone vacuum my lap, I think this girl needs a clean place to sit. Cause I wanna know Kenya suck this dick? Would you like to help me break it in? Come and live in my heart and pay no rent. Because I want you to have my babies. I think that pick-up lines are for people with to much time on their hands. I'm with the TSA and I need to perform a full body cavity search, for security reasons.

If I were a watermelon, would you spit or swallow my seed? There are people staving in Africa. So now she knows where I live again. Playing doctor is for kids! That's a nice shirt. What are the chances of us engaging in a little more than just conversation? Because I can really see myself in them. I think I could fall madly in bed with you. Coz dam. Ratings and Reviews. He literally went tech-savvy in order to become date -savvy. Your place or mine?